Camp Slasher – Unisex T-Shirt – Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th Horror – Jolly Roger

CAMP: OPEN.

LAKE: CALM.

CABIN: QUESTIONABLE.

COUNSELORS: UNSUPERVISED.

WOODS: SUSPICIOUS.

MASK: HOCKEY.

MACHETES: CROSSED.

JOLLY ROGER: SLASHER EDITION.

SURVIVAL ODDS: LET’S NOT DISCUSS THEM.

Welcome to camp.

Please enjoy swimming, hiking, canoeing, campfires, friendship, fresh air…

and absolutely DO NOT INVESTIGATE THAT NOISE IN THE WOODS.

The Camp Slasher Unisex T-Shirt combines the unmistakable Jason Voorhees hockey-mask imagery with two crossed machetes in a horror-inspired Jolly Roger arrangement, creating the unofficial pirate flag of Camp Crystal Lake.

It’s Friday the 13th meets pirate iconography.

Camp counselor meets terrible career decision.

Summer vacation meets slasher movie.

And the result is exactly what every horror fan needs:

A warning that should probably be flying above the entrance to camp.

Why You’ll Love It:

• Jason Voorhees Inspired Design – Features the unmistakable hockey-mask imagery associated with one of horror’s most recognizable slashers.
• Slasher Jolly Roger Style – Crossed machetes create a sinister horror twist on classic pirate-flag iconography.
• Perfect for Friday the 13th Fans – An immediate visual reference for fans of Jason Voorhees and Camp Crystal Lake.
• Year-Round Horror Style – Because horror fandom doesn’t disappear when Halloween decorations come down.
• Instant Horror-Fan Recognition – Fellow slasher fans will know exactly what they’re looking at.
• Conversation Starter – Particularly among people who have strong opinions about final girls and terrible camp-counselor decisions.
• Great Horror Gift – Perfect for birthdays, Halloween, horror conventions, movie nights, slasher fans, spooky-season enthusiasts, and anyone who would absolutely refuse a summer job at Camp Crystal Lake.

Welcome to Camp Crystal Lake

Counselor:

This place is beautiful.

Horror Fan

Leave.

Counselor

What?

Horror Fan

Immediately.

Counselor

We just got here.

Horror Fan

Exactly.

There’s still time.

Counselor

Why would we leave?

Horror Fan

Looks at lake.

Looks at cabins.

Looks at woods.

Looks at calendar.

Horror Fan

Several reasons.

Counselor

You’re being dramatic.

Horror Fan

That’s what people say approximately fifteen minutes before opening credits.

Camp Orientation

Camp Director:

Welcome, counselors!

Counselors

Woo!

Camp Director

You’ll supervise swimming.

Counselors

Woo!

Camp Director

Lead activities.

Counselors

Woo!

Camp Director

Maintain cabins.

Counselors

Woo!

Camp Director

And under absolutely no circumstances—

Horror Fan

Here it comes.

Camp Director

—should you wander into woods alone after dark.

Counselor

Why?

Horror Fan

DO NOT ASK FOLLOW-UP QUESTION.

Counselor

I’m curious.

Horror Fan

Curiosity is how this starts.

The Cabin

Counselor:

Cute place.

Horror Fan

Door doesn’t lock.

Counselor

It’s rustic.

Horror Fan

Window doesn’t close.

Counselor

Ventilation.

Horror Fan

Lights flicker.

Counselor

Old wiring.

Horror Fan

There’s scratching under floor.

Counselor

Probably raccoon.

Horror Fan

You have now completed entire checklist.

Counselor

What checklist?

Horror Fan

Exactly.

Night One

11:47 P.M.

Counselor

Did you hear that?

Other Counselor

Hear what?

THUMP.

Counselor

That.

Other Counselor

Probably nothing.

Horror Fan Watching Movie

Pause.

Horror Fan

No.

It is never nothing.

Counselor

I’m going check.

Horror Fan

NO.

Counselor

I’ll be right back.

Horror Fan

DOUBLE NO.

Counselor leaves cabin.

Horror Fan

And there it is.

Rule Number One

Never investigate noise.

Rule Number Two

Especially if someone says:

“Probably nothing.”

The Woods

Counselor:

Hello?

Horror Fan

Why are you announcing location?

Counselor:

Anybody there?

Horror Fan

STOP HELPING.

Twig snaps.

Counselor

Who’s there?

Horror Fan

THE PERSON YOU SHOULD BE RUNNING AWAY FROM.

Counselor walks deeper into woods.

Horror Fan

You deserve better decision-making skills.

The Flashlight

Flicker.

Counselor

Come on.

Flicker.

Counselor

Not now.

Flashlight

Dies.

Horror Fan

Of course.

Counselor

Hello?

Horror Fan

STOP SAYING HELLO TO DARKNESS.

The Generator

Lights go out.

Counselor

Generator must have stopped.

Other Counselor

I’ll check.

Horror Fan

Absolutely not.

Counselor

Someone has to.

Horror Fan

No.

Nobody does.

Sit quietly until sunrise.

Counselor

That’s ridiculous.

Horror Fan

Ridiculous people survive.

Generator Shed

Approximately 400 yards into dark woods.

Horror Fan

WHO DESIGNED THIS CAMP?

The Lake

Counselor:

Midnight swim?

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor

Why?

Horror Fan

It’s midnight.

At Crystal Lake.

Counselor

So?

Horror Fan

Those words should never appear together in sentence containing recreational activity.

Counselor

You’re paranoid.

Horror Fan

Correctly paranoid.

The Canoe

Counselor:

Let’s paddle across lake.

Horror Fan

Daytime?

Counselor

No.

Moonlight.

Horror Fan

Absolutely not.

Counselor

It’ll be romantic.

Horror Fan

Romance has terrible survival record in these movies.

Counselor

You’re no fun.

Horror Fan

I’m alive.

The Campfire

Counselor:

Anybody know scary story?

Horror Fan

We’re at Camp Crystal Lake.

Counselor

Yeah?

Horror Fan

Look around.

Counselor

So?

Horror Fan

We’re currently inside scary story.

Counselor

Good point.

Marshmallow

Continues roasting.

The Hockey Mask

Counselor:

Found hockey mask.

Horror Fan

Put it back.

Counselor

Why?

Horror Fan

You know why.

Counselor

Could be souvenir.

Horror Fan

No souvenir has ever had worse energy.

Counselor

I’m keeping it.

Horror Fan

I’m changing cabins.

The Machete

Counselor:

Why is there machete in shed?

Horror Fan

Camp maintenance.

Counselor

Really?

Horror Fan

Probably.

Counselor

Then why are you backing away?

Horror Fan

Because crossed machetes under hockey mask are on my shirt and I’m capable of pattern recognition.

The Jolly Roger

Pirate:

Skull and crossbones.

Horror Fan:

Hockey mask and crossed machetes.

Pirate:

That’s unsettling.

Horror Fan:

That’s point.

Pirate:

What ship do you sail?

Horror Fan:

Canoe.

Pirate:

That’s not ship.

Horror Fan:

It’s Crystal Lake.

We’re working with available transportation.

Pirate:

Fair.

Slasher Fleet

Established.

The Camp Flag

Counselor:

We need flag.

Other Counselor

Camp logo?

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor

State flag?

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor

American flag?

Horror Fan

Different pole.

Counselor

Then what?

Horror Fan

Hockey mask.

Crossed machetes.

Counselor

That’s ominous.

Horror Fan

It’s honest branding.

Camp Marketing Department

Approves.

The Brochure

CAMP CRYSTAL LAKE

Swimming!

Canoeing!

Hiking!

Nature!

Campfires!

Cabins!

Fine Print

Suspicious noises.

Unreliable electricity.

Questionable staffing.

Extremely poor decision-making.

Potential hockey-mask sightings.

Parent

Is this safe?

Camp Representative

Define safe.

Parent

Never mind.

The Counselor Interview

Director:

Why do you want work at camp?

Applicant

Love outdoors.

Director

Excellent.

Any experience?

Applicant

Summer camp.

Swimming.

First aid.

Hiking.

Director

Good.

How fast can you run?

Applicant

Excuse me?

Director

Nothing.

Applicant

Why did you ask that?

Director

No reason.

Applicant

What’s employee turnover?

Director

Next question.

Applicant

I’m withdrawing application.

Smartest Person in Movie

Identified.

First Day on Job

Counselor:

Where’s previous staff?

Director

Gone.

Counselor

Home?

Director

Sure.

Counselor

That wasn’t convincing.

Director

Here’s whistle.

Counselor

I quit.

Final Girl Energy

Activated early.

The Group

Counselor One:

Let’s split up.

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor Two:

We can cover more ground.

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor Three:

I’ll check cabins.

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor Four:

I’ll check woods.

Horror Fan

ABSOLUTELY NO.

Counselor One:

What’s your plan?

Horror Fan

Stay together.

Lock door.

Turn lights on.

Call authorities.

Leave.

Counselors

That’s boring.

Horror Fan

Boring is underrated survival strategy.

The Car

Counselor:

Car won’t start.

Horror Fan

Of course.

Counselor

Battery?

Horror Fan

Probably plot.

Counselor

What?

Horror Fan

Nothing.

Engine

CLICK CLICK CLICK.

Counselor

Come on!

Horror Fan

Stop begging car.

Start running.

Counselor

Where?

Horror Fan

Away from lake.

The Keys

Counselor:

Can’t find keys.

Horror Fan

Check pocket.

Counselor

Not there.

Horror Fan

Table?

Counselor

No.

Horror Fan

Bag?

Counselor

No.

Horror Fan

Ignition?

Counselor

No.

Horror Fan

We’re doomed.

Counselor

That’s dramatic.

Hockey mask appears outside window.

Horror Fan

REVISED:

We’re extremely doomed.

The Phone

Counselor:

No signal.

Horror Fan

Obviously.

Counselor

How can there be no signal?

Horror Fan

Because we’re in horror movie.

Counselor

We aren’t in movie.

Horror Fan

Then explain hockey mask.

Counselor

…

Horror Fan

Exactly.

The Door

Knock knock.

Counselor

Who’s there?

Horror Fan

DO NOT DO KNOCK-KNOCK ROUTINE.

Knock knock.

Counselor

Maybe another counselor.

Horror Fan

Ask them text.

Counselor

There’s no signal.

Horror Fan

Then nobody gets in.

Knock knock.

Both

Stare.

Door

Remains closed.

Horror Fan

Character development.

The Basement

Counselor:

We should check basement.

Horror Fan

Why?

Counselor

Fuse box.

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor

We need lights.

Horror Fan

Darkness is preferable to basement.

Counselor

That makes no sense.

Horror Fan

In horror movies it makes perfect sense.

The Attic

Counselor:

Maybe it’s upstairs.

Horror Fan

No.

Counselor

You say no to everything.

Horror Fan

That’s why I’m still here.

The Strange Cabin

Counselor:

This cabin looks abandoned.

Horror Fan

Great.

Let’s respect abandonment.

Counselor

Maybe there’s something inside.

Horror Fan

There definitely is.

That’s why we’re leaving.

Counselor opens door.

Horror Fan

You people exhaust me.

The Final Girl

Friend:

Why do final girls always seem smarter?

Horror Fan

Because somebody eventually realizes running toward noise is bad.

Friend

Would you survive?

Horror Fan

I’d leave during opening credits.

Friend

That’s cheating.

Horror Fan

That’s surviving.

The Horror Marathon

Friend:

One Friday the 13th movie?

You

Sure.

One Movie Later

Friend

Another?

You

Obviously.

Another Movie Later

Clock

12:38 A.M.

Friend

One more?

You

We’re committed now.

Clock

2:11 A.M.

Friend

I’m hearing noises outside.

You

Do not investigate.

Friend

Probably raccoon.

You

That’s exactly what doomed counselor says.

Doors

Locked.

Horror Education

Successful.

The Movie Night Newbie

Newbie:

Why doesn’t anyone leave?

Horror Fan

Excellent question.

Newbie

Why do they split up?

Horror Fan

Another excellent question.

Newbie

Why investigate noises?

Horror Fan

Now you understand genre.

Newbie

I’d just go home.

Horror Fan

Congratulations.

You’re final girl.

The Horror Convention

Fan:

Jason!

You

Yep.

Fan

Crossed machetes?

You

Slasher Jolly Roger.

Fan

That’s awesome.

You

Thanks.

Fan

Camp Crystal Lake?

You

Worst vacation destination imaginable.

Fan

Absolutely.

Horror Friendship

Established.

The Non-Horror Fan

Person:

Why hockey mask?

You

Jason Voorhees.

Person

Who?

You

From Friday the 13th.

Person

Oh.

You

Camp Crystal Lake.

Person

Never seen it.

You

Okay.

Person

Is it scary?

You

Depends.

Person

On what?

You

How strongly you feel about summer camps.

Person

I went camp as kid.

You

Maybe don’t watch alone.

The Horror Fan’s Vacation

Friend:

Want rent cabin by lake?

You

What’s lake called?

Friend

Why?

You

Answer question.

Friend

Pine Lake.

You

Okay.

Friend

Why does name matter?

You

Professional caution.

Friend

It’s weekend getaway.

You

Does cabin have electricity?

Friend

Mostly.

You

Define mostly.

Friend

Generator.

You

Absolutely not.

Friend

You’re ridiculous.

You

Alive.

The Camping Trip

Friend:

We’re going camping!

You

Campground?

Friend

Remote cabin.

You

No.

Friend

By lake.

You

Double no.

Friend

Surrounded by woods.

You

Triple no.

Friend

No cell service.

You

Are you intentionally constructing horror movie?

Friend

It’ll be fun.

You

I suddenly have plans.

The Tent

Friend:

Hear that?

You

Yes.

Friend

Probably animal.

You

Probably.

Friend

Want check?

You

No.

Friend

What if it’s bear?

You

Then especially no.

Friend

What if someone needs help?

You

Call park ranger.

Friend

No signal.

You

Then we remain tent-based civilization until sunrise.

Survival Instinct

Functional.

The Halloween Party

Friend:

What are you dressed as?

You

Camp counselor who survives.

Friend

What’s costume?

You

Camp Slasher shirt and car keys.

Friend

Car keys?

You

Critical accessory.

Friend

That’s actually smart.

You

Thank you.

The Haunted House

Employee:

Enter if you dare.

You

Fine.

Friend

Scared?

You

No.

Hockey-mask character appears.

You

Okay.

Respect.

Friend

You jumped.

You

Tactical repositioning.

Friend

You screamed.

You

Auditory defense mechanism.

Friend

Sure.

The Office

Coworker:

Camp Slasher?

You

Yep.

Coworker

Jason?

You

Yep.

Coworker

You big horror fan?

You

Yep.

Coworker

Favorite survival strategy?

You

Don’t go to camp.

Coworker

Simple.

You

Effective.

Friday the 13th at Work

Coworker:

You know what day it is?

You

Looks at shirt.

Coworker

Right.

You

If lights start flickering, I’m leaving.

Coworker

It’s office.

Lights flicker.

You

Grabs keys.

Coworker

Wait!

You

I’ve seen enough movies.

The Camp Counselor

Kid:

Can we go into woods?

Counselor

No.

Kid

Why?

Counselor

Safety.

Kid

Can we swim after dark?

Counselor

No.

Kid

Why?

Counselor

Safety.

Kid

Can we investigate abandoned cabin?

Counselor

Absolutely not.

Kid

You’re no fun.

Counselor

You’ll thank me later.

Horror Fans Everywhere

Applaud.

The Gift

Recipient opens package.

Sees hockey mask.

Sees crossed machetes.

Recipient

Jason Jolly Roger?

You

Exactly.

Recipient

This is awesome.

You

Thought you’d like it.

Recipient

Camp Slasher.

You

Worst summer camp.

Best shirt concept.

Gift

Survived delivery.

Birthday?

CAMP SLASHER.

Halloween?

CAMP SLASHER.

Friday the 13th?

CAMP SLASHER.

Horror Convention?

CAMP SLASHER.

Slasher Marathon?

CAMP SLASHER.

Cabin Weekend?

Maybe wear it as warning.

Person Who Hears Noise in Woods and Says “Let’s Check It Out”?

Please give them shirt.

And flashlight.

Actually…

Keep flashlight.

The Camp Slasher Unisex T-Shirt

A fun gift for:

Friday the 13th fans.

Jason Voorhees fans.

Camp Crystal Lake fans.

Slasher-movie fans.

Classic-horror fans.

Horror collectors.

Horror-convention goers.

Halloween enthusiasts.

Spooky-season fans.

Year-round horror fans.

Final-girl fans.

Horror-marathon hosts.

Camp-horror fans.

80s horror fans.

Retro-horror fans.

Movie collectors.

Horror memorabilia collectors.

Jolly Roger fans.

Pirate-horror fans.

Cabin-horror enthusiasts.

Camping-horror fans.

People who know not to split up.

People who know not to investigate strange noises.

People who refuse to enter abandoned cabins.

People who understand that “I’ll be right back” is terrible horror-movie planning.

People who would leave Camp Crystal Lake immediately.

People who lock doors when horror movies start getting suspicious.

People who think car keys are essential final-girl equipment.

People who celebrate Friday the 13th with movie marathon.

And anyone who believes a hockey mask and crossed machetes make one seriously intimidating Jolly Roger.

Camp Slasher Status Report

CAMP: CRYSTAL LAKE.

LAKE: CALM.

CABIN: QUESTIONABLE.

WOODS: SUSPICIOUS.

COUNSELORS: MAKING TERRIBLE DECISIONS.

GENERATOR: UNRELIABLE.

PHONE SIGNAL: NONE.

CAR: WON’T START.

KEYS: MISSING.

FLASHLIGHT: FLICKERING.

STRANGE NOISE: HEARD.

INVESTIGATION: ABSOLUTELY NOT.

GROUP: STAYING TOGETHER.

BASEMENT: AVOIDED.

ABANDONED CABIN: AVOIDED.

MIDNIGHT SWIM: CANCELED.

MASK: HOCKEY.

MACHETES: CROSSED.

JOLLY ROGER: SLASHER EDITION.

JASON: SOMEWHERE.

FINAL GIRL ENERGY: ACTIVATED.

CAR KEYS: SECURED.

EXIT ROUTE: IDENTIFIED.

SURVIVAL PLAN: LEAVE.

CAMP SLASHER.

COME FOR THE LAKE.

STAY BECAUSE YOUR CAR WON’T START.

AND WHATEVER YOU DO…

DON’T INVESTIGATE THAT NOISE IN THE WOODS.

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	S	M	L	XL	2XL	3XL	4XL	5XL
Width, in	17.99	20.00	21.97	23.98	25.98	27.99	30.04	31.97
Length, in	28.00	29.00	30.00	31.00	32.00	33.00	34.00	35.00
Sleeve length, in	7.24	7.76	8.23	8.74	9.25	9.76	10.24	10.75

 

Weight	N/A