Reunited and It Feels So Good – Unisex T-Shirt – Pangea Geology

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: COMPLICATED.

CONTINENTS: TOGETHER.

PERSONAL SPACE: ZERO.

TECTONIC ACTIVITY: SUSPICIOUS.

BREAKUP: PENDING.

REUNION: APPROXIMATELY 200+ MILLION YEARS OVERDUE.

There was a time when everyone got along.

North America.

South America.

Africa.

Europe.

Asia.

Antarctica.

Australia.

All hanging out together.

No giant oceans separating everybody.

No expensive international flights.

No arguing over who has to host Thanksgiving.

Just one enormous prehistoric neighborhood known as:

PANGEA.

Then Earth’s tectonic plates apparently decided everyone needed some space.

And things…

drifted apart.

Literally.

The Reunited and It Feels So Good Unisex T-Shirt – Pangea Edition celebrates Earth’s legendary supercontinent with a clever combination of geology, geography, science, nostalgia, and a gloriously corny reunion joke.

Perfect for geologists, geography nerds, Earth-science teachers, science students, paleontology fans, rock collectors, map lovers, museum regulars, dinosaur enthusiasts, and anyone who thinks continental drift is significantly funnier when treated like relationship drama.

Because before long-distance relationships…

there was Pangea.

Why You’ll Love It:

• Peak Geology Humor – Continental drift becomes the world’s slowest breakup story.
• Pangea Front and Center – A clever graphic celebrates the famous ancient supercontinent and Earth’s constantly changing surface.
• Science Nerd Approved – Perfect for geology, geography, Earth science, plate tectonics, and natural-history fans.
• Easygoing Unisex Style – Great for classrooms, museums, college campuses, field trips, science events, casual weekends, or your next extremely exciting rock-shopping expedition.
• Smart Without Taking Itself Too Seriously – Educational enough for science people, ridiculous enough for everyone else.
• Instant Teacher-Joke Potential – Earth-science teachers are going to get mileage out of this one.
• Perfect Gift for Nerds – Great for geologists, teachers, professors, students, rockhounds, geography enthusiasts, and anyone who can explain plate tectonics without being asked.

Pangea

North America:

Hey.

South America:

Hey.

Africa:

Hey.

Europe:

Hey.

Asia:

Hey.

Australia:

Hey.

Antarctica:

Hey.

Pangea:

Look at us.

All together.

Everyone:

This is nice.

Tectonic Plates:

…

Pangea:

Why are you looking at us like that?

Tectonic Plates:

No reason.

Pangea:

I don’t trust that answer.

The Good Old Days

Africa:

Remember when we all lived together?

South America:

Yeah.

Africa:

Good times.

South America:

We were practically attached.

Africa:

We WERE attached.

South America:

Right.

Africa:

Literally.

South America:

Things got weird after the breakup.

Africa:

You moved across an ocean.

South America:

YOU moved too.

Africa:

Fair.

The Breakup

Pangea:

We need to talk.

Continents:

About what?

Pangea:

I think we need some space.

Continents:

How much space?

Pangea:

…

Continents:

Pangea?

Pangea:

Atlantic Ocean amount.

Continents:

That’s a LOT of space.

Pangea:

I’ve been thinking.

Continental Drift

South America:

Are you moving away from me?

Africa:

No.

South America:

You look farther away.

Africa:

You’re imagining things.

Several Million Years Later

South America:

YOU ARE DEFINITELY FARTHER AWAY.

Africa:

Okay.

Maybe a little.

South America:

A LITTLE?!

The Long-Distance Relationship

Africa:

We can make this work.

South America:

There’s an ocean between us.

Africa:

We can visit.

South America:

How?

Africa:

…

South America:

Exactly.

The Reunion

Continents:

Get back together.

Pangea:

Aww.

Continents:

Look how perfectly we fit.

Pangea:

It’s almost like we used to be connected.

Continents:

Funny coincidence.

Geologist:

Actually—

Everyone:

We know.

Reunited

Friend:

What’s your shirt?

You:

Pangea.

Friend:

Oh.

You:

Reunited.

Friend:

And it feels so—

Friend:

…

You:

There it is.

Friend:

That’s awful.

You:

Geologically awful.

Friend:

Somehow that’s worse.

The Three-Stage Reaction

STAGE ONE:

“Is that Pangea?”

STAGE TWO:

“Reunited?”

STAGE THREE:

“Ohhhhh.”

You:

Science joke successfully deployed.

The Geologist

Geologist:

Nice shirt.

You:

Thanks.

Geologist:

Pangea.

You:

Yep.

Geologist:

Continental drift joke.

You:

Yep.

Geologist:

Excellent.

You:

Finally.

My target demographic.

The Geography Teacher

Teacher:

Nice shirt.

You:

Thanks.

Teacher:

Pangea?

You:

Yep.

Teacher:

I need that.

You:

For educational purposes?

Teacher:

Absolutely.

You:

And the terrible pun?

Teacher:

Especially the terrible pun.

The Earth Science Teacher

Student:

Why are you wearing that?

Teacher:

Because today we’re discussing plate tectonics.

Student:

Is the shirt part of the lesson?

Teacher:

Everything is part of the lesson.

Student:

That’s concerning.

Teacher:

Open your textbook.

The Classroom

Teacher:

What was Pangea?

Student One:

A supercontinent.

Teacher:

Correct.

Student Two:

All the continents together.

Teacher:

Essentially, yes.

Student Three:

Earth’s group photo before everyone moved away.

Teacher:

…

Student Three:

What?

Teacher:

I’m allowing it.

The Test

Question:

Explain continental drift.

Student:

Continents used to be together.

Then they broke up.

Now they’re seeing other oceans.

Teacher:

Technically…

Student:

Do I get credit?

Teacher:

More than I want to give you.

The Essay

Prompt:

Describe the breakup of Pangea.

Student:

Pangea had commitment issues.

Teacher:

Scientifically.

Student:

Tectonic commitment issues.

Teacher:

Please use the textbook.

The Science Fair

Judge:

Tell me about your project.

Student:

Pangea.

Judge:

Interesting.

Student:

It used to be one giant landmass.

Judge:

Good.

Student:

Then everyone drifted apart.

Judge:

Correct.

Student:

Like my friend group after graduation.

Judge:

We’re drifting away from science.

Student:

Appropriate.

The Science Professor

Professor:

Continental drift occurs over enormous timescales.

Student:

How enormous?

Professor:

Millions of years.

Student:

So basically…

really slow moving?

Professor:

Yes.

Student:

My roommate moves faster.

Professor:

I would certainly hope so.

The Impatient Student

Student:

How fast are the continents moving?

Teacher:

Typically centimeters per year.

Student:

That’s it?

Teacher:

Yes.

Student:

Can we watch it?

Teacher:

Not productively.

Student:

This is the slowest action movie ever.

Teacher:

Geology requires patience.

Geology

Biology:

Look! Something moved!

Chemistry:

Look! Something reacted!

Physics:

Look! Something accelerated!

Geology:

Come back in 10 million years.

Everyone:

…

Geology:

What?

The Geology Major

Friend:

What’s your major?

Student:

Geology.

Friend:

So…

rocks?

Student:

Here we go.

Friend:

You study rocks?

Student:

Among MANY OTHER THINGS.

Friend:

Rock degree.

Student:

I regret this conversation.

The Rock

Friend:

What’s this?

Geologist:

Basalt.

Friend:

Cool.

What’s this?

Geologist:

Granite.

Friend:

Cool.

What’s this?

Geologist:

Please stop picking up random rocks.

Friend:

I thought you liked rocks.

Geologist:

That’s not how this works.

The Rock Collector

Partner:

Why is there a rock on the kitchen table?

You:

Interesting specimen.

Partner:

It’s a rock.

You:

Correct.

Partner:

Why is it inside?

You:

Collection.

Partner:

There are twelve rocks on the bookshelf.

You:

Also collection.

Partner:

We live outside.

There are rocks everywhere.

You:

Not THESE rocks.

The Rockhound

Friend:

Did you just put a rock in your pocket?

You:

Yes.

Friend:

Why?

You:

Look at it.

Friend:

I am.

You:

Exactly.

Friend:

I still don’t understand.

You:

Then you don’t deserve the rock.

The Road Cut

Normal Person:

Drives past.

Geologist:

SLOW DOWN.

Driver:

Why?

Geologist:

LOOK AT THOSE LAYERS.

Driver:

We’re on the highway.

Geologist:

THE STRATIGRAPHY.

Driver:

Please sit down.

The Hiking Trip

Friend:

Beautiful view.

You:

Yep.

Friend:

Mountains are amazing.

Geologist:

Do you know how these formed?

Friend:

No.

Geologist:

Excellent.

Friend:

Why excellent?

Geologist:

Because I have a 45-minute explanation prepared.

Friend:

I shouldn’t have come hiking with you.

The Mountain

Tourist:

Beautiful.

Geologist:

Folded strata.

Tourist:

Majestic.

Geologist:

Tectonic uplift.

Tourist:

Inspiring.

Geologist:

Erosion.

Tourist:

Can you just enjoy something normally?

Geologist:

I AM enjoying it.

The Beach

Friend:

Let’s relax.

Geologist:

Interesting sediment.

Friend:

No.

Geologist:

But—

Friend:

No geology today.

Geologist:

We’re literally sitting on geology.

Friend:

I knew you’d say that.

The Museum

Friend:

We’ve been looking at rocks for an hour.

You:

Minerals.

Friend:

Whatever.

You:

Those are different things.

Friend:

I knew correcting you would be a mistake.

You:

Come here.

I’ll explain.

Friend:

NO.

The Natural History Museum

Exhibit:

PANGEA.

You:

Points at shirt.

Friend:

Yes.

We see it.

You:

This is my moment.

Friend:

You’ve been waiting all day for this.

You:

Possibly my entire life.

Museum Employee:

Nice shirt.

You:

THANK YOU.

Friend:

Great.

Now you’ve encouraged them.

The Dinosaur Exhibit

Friend:

Were dinosaurs around when Pangea existed?

You:

Now we’re getting into it.

Friend:

That sounded dangerous.

You:

How much time do you have?

Friend:

I shouldn’t have asked.

You:

Too late.

The Dinosaur Fan

Dinosaur Fan:

Pangea!

You:

Yep.

Dinosaur Fan:

Nice.

You:

Thanks.

Dinosaur Fan:

You know what’s really interesting—

Friend:

NO.

Dinosaur Fan:

What?

Friend:

There are two of you now.

You:

This is going to be a great afternoon.

The Paleontology Student

Friend:

So you dig up dinosaurs?

Student:

Not exactly.

Friend:

But dinosaurs.

Student:

Sometimes.

Friend:

And rocks.

Student:

It’s more complicated.

Friend:

Dinosaur rocks.

Student:

I’m going home.

The Map Nerd

Friend:

Why do you have so many maps?

You:

They’re interesting.

Friend:

You have a map of Pangea.

You:

Obviously.

Friend:

You have a map of tectonic plates.

You:

Obviously.

Friend:

You have a topographic map framed in your living room.

You:

Art.

Friend:

You’re a very specific person.

You:

Thank you.

The Globe

Friend:

Where’s Pangea?

You:

Not on that globe.

Friend:

Why not?

You:

Wrong era.

Friend:

Can I get an ancient globe?

You:

That’s…

not really how—

Friend:

I want a Pangea globe.

You:

Actually, now I do too.

The Geography Nerd

Friend:

Name a country.

You:

No.

Friend:

Come on.

You:

Why?

Friend:

You’re the geography person.

You:

That doesn’t mean I’m performing geography tricks at parties.

Friend:

Capital of Mongolia.

You:

Ulaanbaatar.

Friend:

HA!

You:

I hate that this worked.

The Puzzle

Friend:

Doing a world-map puzzle?

You:

Yep.

Friend:

Looks difficult.

You:

Not really.

Friend:

What would make it easier?

You:

Pangea.

Friend:

…

You:

One big piece.

Friend:

That’s not how puzzles work.

You:

Let me have this.

The Continental Puzzle

North America:

Where do I go?

South America:

Under me.

Africa:

I’m in the middle.

Europe:

Scoot over.

Asia:

I need more room.

Australia:

Where am I?

Antarctica:

Down here.

Everyone:

This is complicated.

Pangea:

See?

We should have stayed together.

The Family Reunion

Relative:

Everyone’s here!

You:

Reunited.

Relative:

Yep.

You:

And it feels—

Relative:

Don’t.

You:

Looks at Pangea shirt.

Relative:

I knew you wore that specifically for this.

You:

Worth it.

The Reunion Photo

Photographer:

Everybody squeeze together.

You:

Pangea style.

Family:

Groans.

Photographer:

I liked it.

You:

Thank you.

Family:

Don’t encourage them.

The Friend Reunion

Friend:

It’s been ten years!

You:

We’re finally reunited.

Friend:

Yep!

You:

Points at shirt.

Friend:

You planned this.

You:

Months ago.

Friend:

That’s absurd.

You:

Commitment to the joke.

The High School Reunion

Classmate:

Haven’t seen you in twenty years.

You:

That’s nothing.

Classmate:

What?

You:

Pangea’s been waiting roughly 200 million.

Classmate:

Still making nerd jokes?

You:

Some things never change.

The Relationship

Partner:

I need some space.

You:

How much?

Partner:

Just a little.

You:

Continental drift amount?

Partner:

What?

You:

Because that could become significant over several million years.

Partner:

This is why I need space.

You:

Fair.

The Breakup

Friend:

We drifted apart.

You:

Like continents?

Friend:

Can you be serious for one minute?

You:

Sorry.

Friend:

Thank you.

You:

But technically—

Friend:

NO.

The Long-Distance Friendship

Friend:

I miss when we lived closer.

You:

Me too.

Friend:

Now you’re across the country.

You:

Continental drift.

Friend:

You moved for a job.

You:

Human tectonics.

Friend:

Stop.

The Moving Day

Friend:

Why are you moving?

You:

Needed a change.

Friend:

I’ll miss you.

You:

We’ll stay connected.

Friend:

Promise?

You:

Absolutely.

Friend:

Unlike Pangea?

You:

You’ve learned.

The Earth

Earth:

I’ve been thinking.

Continents:

Oh no.

Earth:

Maybe rearrange things a little.

Continents:

How little?

Earth:

Give it time.

Continents:

How much time?

Earth:

Several hundred million years.

Continents:

That’s not little.

Earth:

Geologically speaking?

Pretty casual.

Earth’s Interior

Mantle:

Moves slowly.

Crust:

Responds.

Plates:

Move.

Continents:

Move.

Humans:

Nothing’s happening.

Geologist:

Oh, things are happening.

Humans:

Where?

Geologist:

Everywhere.

Very slowly.

Humans:

Can we see it?

Geologist:

Not like that.

Humans:

Less exciting than advertised.

The Tectonic Plate

Plate One:

You’re pushing me.

Plate Two:

You’re pushing ME.

Plate One:

Move.

Plate Two:

You move.

Mountain Range:

Appears eventually.

Plate One:

Look what you did.

Plate Two:

WE did.

Convergent Boundary

Plate One:

Coming through.

Plate Two:

No.

Plate One:

Move.

Plate Two:

No.

Mountains:

Hello.

Geologist:

Fascinating.

Plates:

We’re having an argument.

Divergent Boundary

Plate One:

I think we should see other plates.

Plate Two:

Are you breaking up with me?

Plate One:

We’re drifting apart.

Plate Two:

Wow.

Magma:

Mind if I come through?

Both:

Not now.

Transform Boundary

Plate One:

Move.

Plate Two:

You move.

Plate One:

I’m trying.

Plate Two:

So am I.

Stress:

Increasing.

Geologist:

Uh-oh.

The Fault

Friend:

Whose fault is it?

Geologist:

Depends.

Friend:

That sounded philosophical.

Geologist:

No.

Literally.

Friend:

Oh.

Geologist:

Geology joke.

Friend:

You’ve become the shirt.

The Earthquake Conversation

Friend:

Why do earthquakes happen?

Geologist:

Okay.

Imagine—

Friend:

Actually, I only wanted the short version.

Geologist:

Too late.

Friend:

Oh no.

Geologist:

Let’s begin with plate tectonics.

Friend:

I have made a mistake.

The Volcano

Friend:

Why are there volcanoes there?

Geologist:

Plate boundaries.

Friend:

And there?

Geologist:

Hotspot.

Friend:

And there?

Geologist:

How much time do you have?

Friend:

Less than you want.

The Science Nerd

Person:

Cool Pangea shirt.

You:

Thanks.

Person:

Plate tectonics?

You:

Yep.

Person:

You know Wegener originally—

You:

Oh, we’re doing this.

Person:

Doing what?

You:

Becoming best friends.

The Alfred Wegener Conversation

Friend:

Who proposed continental drift?

You:

Alfred Wegener.

Friend:

How do you know that?

You:

Shirt has responsibilities.

Friend:

The shirt didn’t teach you that.

You:

You can’t prove that.

The Evidence

Teacher:

How do we know continents were once connected?

Student:

They look like puzzle pieces.

Teacher:

That’s one clue.

Student:

Matching fossils.

Teacher:

Good.

Student:

Matching rock formations.

Teacher:

Excellent.

Student:

Pangea T-shirts.

Teacher:

No.

Student:

Worth trying.

The Fossils

Fossil:

Found in South America.

Scientist:

Interesting.

Similar Fossil:

Found in Africa.

Scientist:

Very interesting.

Continents:

Act casual.

Scientist:

You two used to be connected, didn’t you?

Continents:

…

Scientist:

I KNEW IT.

The Puzzle-Piece Coastlines

Friend:

Africa and South America kind of fit together.

You:

Exactly.

Friend:

Like puzzle pieces.

You:

Exactly.

Friend:

Did somebody break Earth?

You:

That’s an aggressively simplified explanation.

Friend:

But memorable.

You:

I’ll give you that.

The Pangea Neighbor

Africa:

Can I borrow some sugar?

South America:

Sure.

Africa:

Thanks.

200 Million Years Later

Africa:

Can I borrow some sugar?

South America:

You’re going to need a boat.

Africa:

Things used to be easier.

Pangea Traffic

North America:

Excuse me.

Europe:

Where are you going?

North America:

Nowhere yet.

Europe:

Why?

North America:

It’s the Mesozoic.

Give it time.

Europe:

Fair.

Pangea Real Estate

Realtor:

Great location.

Buyer:

Near the ocean?

Realtor:

Depends when you’re asking.

Buyer:

What?

Realtor:

Long-term geological market fluctuations.

Buyer:

I think I need another realtor.

Prehistoric Weather Forecast

Meteorologist:

Today’s forecast for Pangea:

Varies dramatically depending on location.

Viewer:

That’s not very helpful.

Meteorologist:

It’s an enormous supercontinent.

Viewer:

Fair.

Meteorologist:

Back to you.

The Dinosaur

Dinosaur:

Looks around Pangea.

Dinosaur:

Nice place.

Earth:

Enjoy it while it lasts.

Dinosaur:

What does that mean?

Earth:

Nothing.

Dinosaur:

That sounded ominous.

The Time Traveler

Traveler:

Where am I?

Scientist:

Pangea.

Traveler:

When am I?

Scientist:

That is the more important question.

Traveler:

How do I get home?

Scientist:

Do you have a time machine?

Traveler:

No.

Scientist:

Then geography is currently the least of your problems.

The Tourist

Tourist:

I’d like to visit Europe.

Pangea Travel Agent:

Walk that way.

Tourist:

What about Africa?

Agent:

Walk slightly differently.

Tourist:

South America?

Agent:

Keep walking.

Tourist:

International travel seems easier.

Agent:

International borders haven’t exactly become a thing yet.

Tourist:

Good point.

Pangea Airlines

Passenger:

Flight to South America?

Agent:

Sir, this is Pangea.

Passenger:

So?

Agent:

Walk.

Passenger:

How far?

Agent:

Very.

Passenger:

I’ll wait for aviation.

The Road Trip

Friend:

Could you road-trip across Pangea?

You:

This question has complications.

Friend:

But theoretically?

You:

We’re about to lose the next hour, aren’t we?

Friend:

Probably.

You:

Excellent.

The Map

Friend:

Where’s the Atlantic Ocean?

You:

Not doing what it does now.

Friend:

Pacific?

You:

Complicated.

Friend:

Europe?

You:

Also complicated.

Friend:

This map is stressing me out.

You:

Deep time will do that.

Deep Time

Human:

100 years is forever.

Historian:

That’s adorable.

Geologist:

Hold my rock.

Human:

What?

Geologist:

Let’s discuss billions.

Human:

Never mind.

The Geologic Time Scale

Student:

I understand.

Teacher:

Great.

Student:

Wait.

Teacher:

What?

Student:

No, I don’t.

Teacher:

That’s normal.

Student:

Good.

Teacher:

Now let’s discuss eons.

Student:

I would like to leave.

The Geologist’s Clock

Normal Person:

See you next year.

Geologist:

Basically immediately.

Normal Person:

What?

Geologist:

Geologic time.

Normal Person:

Please stop.

The Birthday

Friend:

I’m getting old.

You:

You’re 40.

Friend:

Exactly.

You:

Pangea broke apart more than 200 million years ago.

Friend:

Is that supposed to make me feel better?

You:

Perspective.

Friend:

It didn’t work.

The Ancient Thing

Friend:

This building is 200 years old.

You:

Cute.

Friend:

Cute?

You:

Geology changes your definition of old.

Friend:

You’re unbearable.

You:

My shirt warned you.

The Rock’s Perspective

Human:

I’m old.

Rock:

No.

Human:

I’m tired.

Rock:

Understandable.

Human:

I’ve been through a lot.

Rock:

Now THAT we can discuss.

The Introvert

Friend:

Want to hang out?

You:

I need space.

Friend:

Okay.

You:

Not Pangea-level space.

Friend:

What does that mean?

You:

Don’t cross an ocean.

Friend:

Got it.

The Extrovert

Friend:

Everyone should get together!

You:

Pangea tried that.

Friend:

And?

You:

Eventually everyone left.

Friend:

That’s unnecessarily pessimistic.

You:

Geological realism.

The Team-Building Exercise

Manager:

We’re bringing everyone together.

You:

Like Pangea.

Manager:

Exactly!

You:

That ended in catastrophic fragmentation.

Manager:

Please don’t mention that during the presentation.

You:

No promises.

The Corporate Retreat

Manager:

Our theme is unity.

You:

Wears Pangea shirt.

Manager:

Perfect!

You:

Should I explain what happened afterward?

Manager:

No.

You:

Probably wise.

The Group Project

Teacher:

Work together.

Students:

Fine.

Ten Minutes Later

Student One:

I’ll work alone.

Student Two:

Same.

Student Three:

Me too.

Teacher:

You were supposed to collaborate.

You:

Pangea reenactment.

Teacher:

I hate that this is thematically appropriate.

The Friend Group

Friend One:

We should all live near each other someday.

Friend Two:

Yes!

Friend Three:

Definitely.

Ten Years Later

Friend One:

California.

Friend Two:

New York.

Friend Three:

Texas.

You:

Pangea behavior.

Everyone:

Accurate.

The Family

Mom:

Why is there a map on your shirt?

You:

It’s Pangea.

Mom:

Oh.

All the continents together?

You:

Yep.

Mom:

That’s clever.

You:

Thanks.

Mom:

Reunited.

You:

Yep.

Mom:

And it feels so good.

You:

Exactly.

Mom:

I get this one.

You:

Proud of you.

The Dad

Dad:

Pangea?

You:

Yep.

Dad:

That’s solid.

You:

Pun intended?

Dad:

Always.

You:

I should have known.

The Dad Joke Escalation

Dad:

You know why the continents broke up?

You:

Don’t.

Dad:

Too many faults.

You:

Dad.

Dad:

Couldn’t handle the pressure.

You:

DAD.

Dad:

Things got rocky.

You:

I’m leaving.

Dad:

Guess you’re drifting away.

You:

I walked directly into that.

The Grandparent

Grandpa:

Pangea.

You:

Yep.

Grandpa:

Back in my day—

You:

You are not old enough to remember Pangea.

Grandpa:

You didn’t let me finish.

You:

I know where that was going.

Grandpa:

Kids today.

The Gift

Recipient:

You got me a shirt?

You:

Yep.

Recipient:

Pangea!

You:

Read it.

Recipient:

Reunited and It Feels So Good.

You:

Yep.

Recipient:

That’s terrible.

You:

Do you like it?

Recipient:

Very much.

Gift:

Successful.

The Geologist Gift

Geologist:

Opens package.

Geologist:

Oh no.

You:

Good “oh no”?

Geologist:

Very good “oh no.”

You:

Excellent.

Geologist:

I’m wearing this to the department.

You:

Mission accomplished.

The Science Teacher Gift

Teacher:

Pangea shirt!

You:

Yep.

Teacher:

My students are going to hate this pun.

You:

That’s the point.

Teacher:

Perfect.

The Geography Teacher Gift

Teacher:

Reunited?

You:

Yep.

Teacher:

This is going directly into the classroom rotation.

You:

Excellent.

Teacher:

I’m going to make students explain it.

You:

Educational AND annoying.

Teacher:

The dream.

The Earth Science Student Gift

Student:

This is perfect.

You:

I thought so.

Student:

I have a tectonics exam next week.

You:

Study shirt.

Student:

Will it help?

You:

Emotionally.

Student:

I’ll take it.

The Rockhound Gift

Recipient:

Pangea!

You:

Yep.

Recipient:

Nice.

You:

There’s more.

Recipient:

Reads phrase.

Recipient:

Groans.

You:

Perfect.

Recipient:

I love it.

Birthday?

PANGEA.

Graduation?

PANGEA.

Science Teacher Appreciation?

PANGEA.

Geology Student?

PANGEA.

Geography Nerd?

PANGEA.

Museum Trip?

PANGEA.

Science Fair?

PANGEA.

Rock Show?

PANGEA.

Family Reunion?

ABSOLUTELY PANGEA.

Friends Getting Back Together After Years Apart?

You already know.

The Reunited and It Feels So Good Pangea Unisex T-Shirt

A funny science gift for:

Geologists.

Geology students.

Geology professors.

Earth-science teachers.

Earth-science students.

Geography teachers.

Geography students.

Science teachers.

Science professors.

Science nerds.

Geography nerds.

Map lovers.

Rockhounds.

Rock collectors.

Mineral collectors.

Natural-history fans.

Museum lovers.

Paleontology enthusiasts.

Dinosaur fans.

Fossil hunters.

Hikers.

Field-geology students.

Plate-tectonics enthusiasts.

Continental-drift nerds.

People who know what Pangea was.

People who know more about Pangea than anyone asked.

People who recognize continents by shape.

People who collect maps.

People who stare at road cuts.

People who pick up interesting rocks.

People whose homes contain suspicious numbers of interesting rocks.

People who understand the difference between rocks and minerals.

People who WILL explain that difference to you.

People who get excited about strata.

People who understand geologic time.

People who pretend to understand geologic time.

People who think millions of years sounds perfectly reasonable.

People who have used “subduction zone” in casual conversation.

People who make fault jokes.

People who make pressure jokes.

People who make rock jokes.

People whose friends wish they would stop making geology jokes.

People attending family reunions.

People attending class reunions.

People reuniting with old friends.

People who have drifted apart.

People who appreciate extremely slow breakup jokes.

And anyone who looks at the modern continents and occasionally thinks:

“You guys really should get back together.”

Pangea Status Report

EARTH: YOUNGER.

CONTINENTS: TOGETHER.

SUPERCONTINENT: ASSEMBLED.

PANGEA: ACTIVE.

PERSONAL SPACE: MINIMAL.

NEIGHBORS: EVERYONE.

AFRICA: CLOSE.

SOUTH AMERICA: ALSO CLOSE.

NORTH AMERICA: NEARBY.

EUROPE: RIGHT THERE.

ASIA: CONNECTED.

ANTARCTICA: PART OF THE PARTY.

AUSTRALIA: PRESENT.

OCEAN SITUATION: DIFFERENT.

TECTONIC PLATES: MOVING.

MOVEMENT SPEED: EXTREMELY UNDRAMATIC.

MANTLE: DOING MANTLE THINGS.

PRESSURE: BUILDING.

FAULTS: PRESENT.

GEOLOGIST: EXCITED.

NORMAL PERSON: CONFUSED.

CONTINENTAL DRIFT: INITIATED.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: DRIFTING APART.

BREAKUP SPEED: CENTIMETERS PER YEAR.

BREAKUP DURATION: MILLIONS OF YEARS.

SOUTH AMERICA: DEPARTING.

AFRICA: ALSO MOVING.

ATLANTIC: EXPANDING.

LONG-DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP: ESTABLISHED.

DINOSAURS: EVENTUALLY INVOLVED IN THE STORY.

FOSSILS: LEAVING CLUES.

ROCK FORMATIONS: ALSO LEAVING CLUES.

WEGENER: TAKING NOTES.

SCIENCE TEACHER: PREPARING LESSON.

STUDENT: ASKING IF THIS IS ON THE TEST.

ANSWER: PROBABLY.

ROCKHOUND: PICKING SOMETHING UP.

PARTNER: ASKING WHY ANOTHER ROCK IS COMING HOME.

MAP NERD: DELIGHTED.

DAD JOKE: LOADED.

TECTONIC PUNS: INEVITABLE.

FAULT JOKES: ALSO INEVITABLE.

SCIENCE HUMOR: MAXIMUM.

GEOLOGICAL PATIENCE: REQUIRED.

REUNION DATE: TO BE DETERMINED.

ESTIMATED WAIT: VERY, VERY LONG.

CURRENT MOOD: REUNITED AND IT FEELS SO GOOD.

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This heavy cotton tee has the classic cotton look and feel. Casual elegance will make it an instant favorite in everyone’s wardrobe.

 

.: Classic fit

.: 100% Cotton (fibre content may vary for different colors)

.: Light fabric (5.3 oz/yd² (180 g/m²))

.: Tear away label

.: Runs true to size

 

 

	S	M	L	XL	2XL	3XL	4XL	5XL
Width, in	18	20	21.97	23.98	25.99	28	30.04	31.97
Length, in	28.51	29.49	30.52	31.5	32.52	33.51	34.49	35.52
Sleeve length, in	7.25	7.76	8.23	8.75	9.26	9.77	10.24	10.75

 

Weight	N/A