Snowman Anatomy – Color Accent Mug – Funny Christmas – Science Coffee Mug

SPECIMEN: SNOWMAN.

CARROT NOSE: CONFIRMED.

COAL EYES: CONFIRMED.

STICK ARMS: CONFIRMED.

EMERGENCY BACKUP SNOWBALL: CONFIRMED.

SCIENTIFIC ACCURACY: QUESTIONABLE.

COFFEE: HOT.

RESEARCHER: CAFFEINATED.

SNOWMAN SCIENCE: OFFICIALLY UNDERWAY.

Finally, there’s a coffee mug for people who have looked at a snowman and thought:

“Yes, but what exactly is going on anatomically?”

The Snowman Anatomy Color Accent Mug combines Christmas cheer, winter humor, questionable science, and your favorite hot beverage into one delightfully ridiculous piece of holiday drinkware.

Featuring a funny diagram-style snowman with labeled parts including the Carrot Nose, Coal Eyes, and mysterious Emergency Backup Snowball, this ceramic mug transforms an ordinary coffee or cocoa break into a highly sophisticated session of snowman research.

And by “highly sophisticated,” we mean:

You stare at the diagram.

Take a sip.

Read Emergency Backup Snowball again.

Laugh.

Take another sip.

Research complete.

Available in 11 oz and 15 oz sizes, the mug also features a colorful interior and matching handle for an extra pop of festive personality.

It’s perfect for Christmas mornings, snow days, holiday movie marathons, teachers’ lounges, office coffee breaks, winter weekends, white elephant exchanges, Secret Santa gifts, hot cocoa sessions, and anyone conducting important research into carrot-based nasal anatomy before they’ve had their morning caffeine.

Why You’ll Love It:

• Funny Snowman Anatomy Design – A hilariously unnecessary scientific breakdown of everyone’s favorite frozen winter resident.
• Educational-ish Holiday Humor – Learn about carrot noses, coal eyes, stick arms, and the still unexplained Emergency Backup Snowball.
• Festive Color Accent Style – A colorful interior and matching handle add extra holiday personality.
• Available in 11 oz & 15 oz Sizes – Choose the appropriate caffeine capacity for your level of winter research.
• Perfect for Coffee or Cocoa Season – Great for chilly mornings, snow days, Christmas movie nights, and post-snowman-building warmups.
• Great Teacher & STEM Humor – Especially fun for science teachers, STEM enthusiasts, engineers, biology fans, and diagram lovers.
• Excellent Gag Gift – Perfect for Secret Santa exchanges, white elephant parties, coworkers, teachers, snowman collectors, and winter humor fans.

Snowman Research Laboratory

Scientist:

Coffee?

Assistant:

Yes.

Scientist:

Snowman?

Assistant:

Yes.

Scientist:

Diagram?

Assistant:

Yes.

Scientist:

Excellent.

Let’s begin.

Research Status

SPECIMEN: FROZEN.

LAB TEMPERATURE: CONCERNINGLY WARM.

RESEARCHER: CAFFEINATED.

MUG: FULL.

SCIENTIFIC METHOD: LOOSELY INTERPRETED.

Assistant:

Shouldn’t the snowman be outside?

Scientist:

Why?

Assistant:

Because it’s 72 degrees in here.

Scientist:

…

Assistant:

Doctor?

Scientist:

GET THE SPECIMEN OUTSIDE.

Snowman Anatomy 101

Professor:

Today we’ll be studying snowman anatomy.

Student:

Is that real?

Professor:

You’re holding the mug.

You tell me.

Student:

It says “Emergency Backup Snowball.”

Professor:

Exactly.

Student:

That doesn’t answer my question.

Professor:

Welcome to higher education.

The Carrot Nose

Student:

Why a carrot?

Professor:

Excellent question.

Student:

Well?

Professor:

Traditional nasal architecture.

Student:

What does that mean?

Professor:

Carrot.

Student:

That’s not an explanation.

Professor:

It is before coffee.

Carrot Nose Analysis

MATERIAL: CARROT.

COLOR: ORANGE.

SHAPE: POINTY.

LOCATION: FACE.

SMELLING ABILITY: UNCONFIRMED.

RABBIT RESISTANCE: TERRIBLE.

Student:

Why are we measuring rabbit resistance?

Professor:

Because experience has taught us things.

The Rabbit

Rabbit:

Sees snowman.

Snowman:

…

Rabbit:

Sees carrot.

Snowman:

…

Rabbit:

Approaches.

Snowman:

…

Scientist:

Everybody stay calm.

Rabbit:

Takes carrot.

Scientist:

WE’VE BEEN BREACHED.

Carrot Security Status

NOSE: MISSING.

SECURITY: FAILED.

PRIMARY SUSPECT: RABBIT.

MOTIVE: LUNCH.

Scientist:

Write that down.

Assistant:

“Rabbit ate nose”?

Scientist:

Use scientific language.

Assistant:

“Lagomorph-mediated nasal component removal.”

Scientist:

Perfect.

The Coal Eyes

Student:

Can a snowman see through coal?

Professor:

Unknown.

Student:

Then why are they eyes?

Professor:

They occupy the traditional eye location.

Student:

That’s your entire argument?

Professor:

Before my second cup?

Yes.

Vision Analysis

LEFT EYE: COAL.

RIGHT EYE: COAL.

VISION: UNKNOWN.

BLINKING: IMPOSSIBLE.

STARING: EXCEPTIONAL.

You:

That’s actually a little creepy.

Snowman:

…

You:

Stop.

Snowman:

…

You:

I know you can’t hear me, but stop.

The Stick Arms

Engineer:

Elegant.

Scientist:

They’re sticks.

Engineer:

Minimalist.

Scientist:

Sticks.

Engineer:

Lightweight.

Scientist:

STICKS.

Engineer:

Naturally sourced structural appendages.

Scientist:

Why do engineers make everything sound complicated?

Engineer:

Precision.

Stick Arm Specifications

LEFT ARM: STICK.

RIGHT ARM: STICK.

SHOULDER: SNOW.

ELBOW: BRANCH-DEPENDENT.

FINGERS: OPTIONAL.

GRIP STRENGTH: POOR.

COFFEE-HOLDING ABILITY: EXTREMELY POOR.

Engineer:

Major design flaw.

You:

Finally, useful research.

The Buttons

Student:

Why does he have buttons?

Professor:

Decoration.

Student:

What’s he buttoning?

Professor:

Nothing.

Student:

There’s no shirt.

Professor:

Correct.

Student:

Then those aren’t functioning buttons.

Professor:

You’re catching on.

Button Analysis

BUTTONS: THREE.

SHIRT: ZERO.

BUTTONHOLES: ZERO.

FUNCTIONAL PURPOSE: ZERO.

FESTIVE PURPOSE: HIGH.

Student:

This whole course is ridiculous.

Professor:

And yet you’re taking notes.

The Emergency Backup Snowball

Student:

Okay.

Here we go.

Professor:

What?

Student:

Emergency Backup Snowball.

Professor:

Critical system.

Student:

WHAT DOES IT DO?

Professor:

Provides backup.

Student:

FOR WHAT?

Professor:

Emergency situations.

Student:

WHICH SITUATIONS?

Professor:

The ones requiring a snowball.

Student:

You know absolutely nothing, do you?

Professor:

Refill?

Student:

Yes.

Emergency Backup Snowball Status

SYSTEM: READY.

LOCATION: CLASSIFIED.

PURPOSE: CLASSIFIED.

DEPLOYMENT: CLASSIFIED.

RESEARCHER UNDERSTANDING: ZERO.

COFFEE CONSUMPTION: INCREASING.

Student:

We’re getting nowhere.

Professor:

But we’re getting there caffeinated.

The 11 oz Mug

Friend:

Eleven ounce?

You:

Yep.

Friend:

Enough?

You:

For normal winter conditions.

Friend:

And a snow day?

You:

Depends.

Friend:

On what?

You:

Number of children in house.

Friend:

Ah.

The 15 oz Mug

Friend:

Fifteen ounces?

You:

Yep.

Friend:

Serious coffee.

You:

Serious science.

Friend:

You’re studying a cartoon snowman.

You:

SERIOUS SCIENCE.

Caffeine Capacity Assessment

11 OZ: ROUTINE SNOWMAN RESEARCH.

15 OZ: ADVANCED SNOWMAN RESEARCH.

11 OZ: QUIET CHRISTMAS MORNING.

15 OZ: FAMILY CHRISTMAS MORNING.

11 OZ: LIGHT SNOWFALL.

15 OZ: SCHOOL CANCELED.

11 OZ: ONE CHILD ASKING TO BUILD A SNOWMAN.

15 OZ: FOUR CHILDREN ALREADY PUTTING ON BOOTS.

Parent:

Fifteen.

Definitely fifteen.

Snow Day Morning

Child:

IT SNOWED!

Parent:

What time is it?

Child:

6:12!

Parent:

Go back to bed.

Child:

SNOW!

Parent:

Coffee.

Child:

SNOWMAN!

Parent:

COFFEE.

Child:

COME ON!

Parent:

COFFEE FIRST.

Snow Day Protocol

SNOW: CONFIRMED.

SCHOOL: CANCELED.

CHILD ENERGY: 147%.

PARENT ENERGY: 4%.

COFFEE: BREWING.

SNOWMAN ANATOMY MUG: DEPLOYED.

Parent:

Now we can discuss snowmen.

The Weather Report

Weather:

Six inches overnight.

Child:

YES!

Parent:

Coffee.

Weather:

Additional accumulation possible.

Child:

YES!

Parent:

Coffee.

Weather:

Road conditions hazardous.

Parent:

We’re staying home.

Child:

SNOWMAN!

Parent:

After coffee.

The Snowman Construction Crew

Child:

We need a big base.

Parent:

Yep.

Child:

Bigger.

Parent:

Okay.

Child:

BIGGER.

Parent:

We still have to move it.

Child:

BIGGER.

Twenty Minutes Later

Parent:

We cannot move it.

Child:

Why?

Parent:

Because somebody demanded BIGGER.

Child:

Oh.

Parent:

Sip.

Construction Status

BASE: MASSIVE.

MOBILITY: ZERO.

CHILD: PLEASED.

PARENT: QUESTIONING PROJECT MANAGEMENT.

COFFEE: STILL HELPING.

The Middle Snowball

Child:

Lift!

Parent:

I’m trying!

Child:

LIFT!

Parent:

YOU MADE IT TOO BIG!

Child:

You said we could!

Parent:

I WASN’T THINKING CLEARLY!

Child:

Why?

Parent:

I HADN’T FINISHED MY COFFEE!

Engineering Lesson

PROBLEM: SNOWBALL TOO HEAVY.

CAUSE: AMBITION.

SOLUTION: SMALLER SNOWBALL.

LESSON: CAFFEINATE BEFORE ENGINEERING.

The Carrot Installation

Child:

Carrot.

Parent:

Check.

Child:

Coal eyes.

Parent:

We don’t have coal.

Child:

Rocks?

Parent:

Rocks.

Child:

Stick arms.

Parent:

Check.

Child:

Emergency Backup Snowball.

Parent:

…

Child:

Well?

Parent:

I was hoping you’d forgotten that.

The Diagram Comparison

Child:

Look at the mug.

Parent:

Okay.

Child:

Carrot nose.

Parent:

Yep.

Child:

Eyes.

Parent:

Yep.

Child:

Arms.

Parent:

Yep.

Child:

Backup snowball.

Parent:

Still don’t know where it goes.

Child:

We need one anyway.

Parent:

Fine.

Scientific Accuracy Check

DIAGRAM: CONSULTED.

SNOWMAN: CONSTRUCTED.

CARROT: PRESENT.

EYES: PRESENT.

STICKS: PRESENT.

BACKUP SNOWBALL: PLACED NEARBY FOR UNDEFINED REASONS.

Parent:

Perfect.

Child:

Science.

Parent:

Sure.

The Post-Snow Warmup

BOOTS: OFF.

GLOVES: WET.

COAT: HANGING.

SOCKS: SOMEHOW WET.

FINGERS: COLD.

COCOA: HOT.

You:

This is the best part.

Child:

Can we go back outside?

You:

I JUST SAT DOWN.

The Hot Cocoa

COCOA: POURED.

MARSHMALLOWS: ADDED.

MORE MARSHMALLOWS: ADDED.

WHIPPED CREAM: ADDED.

Friend:

Can you still technically call that cocoa?

You:

Yes.

Friend:

I can’t see any liquid.

You:

It’s underneath.

Friend:

Somewhere?

You:

Have faith.

Marshmallow Research

Scientist:

How many marshmallows are optimal?

Assistant:

Six?

Scientist:

Incorrect.

Assistant:

Eight?

Scientist:

Incorrect.

Assistant:

Twelve?

Scientist:

Closer.

Assistant:

What’s the answer?

Scientist:

Until you can no longer see the cocoa.

Assistant:

That’s not science.

Scientist:

It’s Christmas science.

The Coffee Version

Friend:

Coffee?

You:

Yep.

Friend:

Black?

You:

Yep.

Friend:

No marshmallows?

You:

This is serious research.

Friend:

You’re wearing pajamas.

You:

Research attire.

Christmas Morning

TREE: LIT.

PRESENTS: READY.

CHRISTMAS MUSIC: PLAYING.

COFFEE: BREWING.

SNOWMAN ANATOMY: BEING STUDIED FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON.

Family Member:

What’s Emergency Backup Snowball?

You:

We don’t know.

Family Member:

You’ve had that mug for months.

You:

Research continues.

The Christmas Breakfast

Relative:

Pass the pancakes.

You:

Here.

Relative:

Pass the syrup.

You:

Here.

Relative:

What’s on your mug?

You:

Snowman anatomy.

Relative:

Emergency Backup Snowball?

You:

Yep.

Relative:

What’s that?

You:

And now you understand my struggle.

Breakfast Status

PANCAKES: READY.

SYRUP: READY.

COFFEE: READY.

SNOWMAN RESEARCH: STALLED.

BACKUP SNOWBALL MYSTERY: UNSOLVED.

Aunt:

Maybe it’s an extra body part.

You:

DON’T START.

The Christmas Movie Marathon

Friend:

Another movie?

You:

Absolutely.

Friend:

Another cocoa?

You:

Obviously.

Friend:

Another handful of marshmallows?

You:

Why are you asking questions you already know the answer to?

Movie Marathon Status

MOVIE ONE: COMPLETE.

MOVIE TWO: PLAYING.

MOVIE THREE: QUEUED.

COCOA: REFILLED.

COUCH: OCCUPIED.

BLANKET: DEPLOYED.

SNOWMAN MUG: FESTIVE.

You:

Winter perfection.

The Teacher’s Lounge

Teacher One:

Coffee?

Science Teacher:

Essential.

Teacher One:

Snowman Anatomy?

Science Teacher:

Correct.

Teacher One:

Emergency Backup Snowball?

Science Teacher:

Don’t ask.

Teacher One:

Why?

Science Teacher:

I’ve been trying to determine its function since November.

Teacher One:

Any progress?

Science Teacher:

None.

Teacher One:

More coffee?

Science Teacher:

Now you’re thinking scientifically.

Teacher Lounge Status

TIME: 7:14 A.M.

STUDENTS ARRIVING: SOON.

COFFEE LEVEL: INSUFFICIENT.

15 OZ MUG: STRATEGICALLY SELECTED.

TEACHER ENERGY: LOADING.

Teacher:

Almost ready.

The Science Classroom

Student:

Cool mug.

Teacher:

Thank you.

Student:

Snowman Anatomy?

Teacher:

Yep.

Student:

Is that real?

Teacher:

Pop quiz.

Student:

WHAT?

Teacher:

Identify the nasal structure.

Student:

Carrot.

Teacher:

Correct.

Ocular structures?

Student:

Coal.

Teacher:

Correct.

Emergency Backup Snowball?

Student:

No idea.

Teacher:

Perfect.

You’ve mastered the curriculum.

The Biology Teacher

Biologist:

This is anatomically ridiculous.

You:

Correct.

Biologist:

Snowmen don’t have organs.

You:

Correct.

Biologist:

Coal isn’t an eye.

You:

Correct.

Biologist:

A carrot isn’t a nose.

You:

Correct.

Biologist:

Emergency Backup Snowball isn’t an anatomical structure.

You:

Can you prove that?

Biologist:

…

You:

Got you.

Biologist:

No you didn’t.

The Chemistry Teacher

Chemist:

Snow is H₂O.

You:

Yep.

Chemist:

Frozen H₂O.

You:

Yep.

Chemist:

So most of this diagram could simply say H₂O.

You:

That would ruin the joke.

Chemist:

Scientifically accurate, though.

You:

Nobody bought this mug for scientific accuracy.

Chemist:

Fair.

The Physics Teacher

Physicist:

The scarf is interesting.

You:

Why?

Physicist:

A scarf is intended to retain heat.

You:

Okay.

Physicist:

But the snowman benefits from remaining cold.

You:

Don’t.

Physicist:

Therefore—

You:

DON’T.

Physicist:

Thermodynamically—

You:

DRINK YOUR COFFEE.

Physicist:

Fine.

The Engineer

Engineer:

Emergency Backup Snowball.

You:

Yep.

Engineer:

Redundancy.

You:

That’s what the last engineer said.

Engineer:

Because redundancy matters.

You:

What exactly is it backing up?

Engineer:

Doesn’t matter.

You:

How does that not matter?

Engineer:

If the primary snowball fails, you’ll be glad it’s there.

You:

Which primary snowball?

Engineer:

Yes.

You:

I regret asking.

Engineering Status

PRIMARY SYSTEM: SNOWBALL.

SECONDARY SYSTEM: SNOWBALL.

BACKUP SYSTEM: SNOWBALL.

REDUNDANCY: EXCELLENT.

UNDERSTANDING: MINIMAL.

Engineer:

Robust architecture.

The Office

Coworker:

Nice Christmas mug.

You:

Thanks.

Coworker:

Snowman diagram?

You:

Yep.

Coworker:

What’s Emergency Backup Snowball?

You:

Nobody knows.

Coworker:

Then why is it labeled?

You:

To create conversations exactly like this.

Coworker:

That’s actually brilliant.

Office Coffee Status

EMAILS: 24.

MEETINGS: 3.

DEADLINES: 2.

HOLIDAY VACATION: APPROACHING.

COFFEE: REQUIRED.

SNOWMAN SCIENCE: PROVIDING DISTRACTION.

Coworker:

Can I study the mug instead of attending the meeting?

You:

Approved.

Boss:

Not approved.

The Office Christmas Party

Coworker:

You brought your mug?

You:

Yep.

Coworker:

Why?

You:

Research doesn’t stop for parties.

Coworker:

You’re drinking cocoa.

You:

Research fuel.

Coworker:

With twelve marshmallows.

You:

Precision measurement.

The White Elephant Exchange

Person One:

Who’s next?

Person Two:

Me.

Opens gift.

Person Two:

Snowman Anatomy mug.

Everyone:

Pass it around!

Person Three:

Emergency Backup Snowball?!

Person Four:

I want that.

Person Five:

I’m stealing it.

Person Two:

NO.

White Elephant Status

GIFT: MUG.

RECIPIENT: HAPPY.

STEAL ATTEMPT ONE: COMPLETE.

STEAL ATTEMPT TWO: PENDING.

HOLIDAY DIPLOMACY: FAILING.

You:

Gag gift success.

Secret Santa

Recipient:

You got me a mug?

You:

Read it.

Recipient:

Snowman Anatomy.

You:

Keep going.

Recipient:

Emergency Backup Snowball.

You:

There it is.

Recipient:

I don’t understand.

You:

Nobody does.

Recipient:

I love it.

You:

Exactly.

The Coworker Gift

Coworker:

Is this because I drink too much coffee?

You:

No.

Coworker:

Because I’m a science nerd?

You:

Partly.

Coworker:

Because I love Christmas?

You:

Partly.

Coworker:

Because you wanted to watch me try to figure out Emergency Backup Snowball?

You:

Mostly that.

The Science Teacher Gift

Teacher:

Snowman Anatomy?

You:

Yep.

Teacher:

This is going to school.

You:

Perfect.

Teacher:

My students are going to ask about the backup snowball.

You:

What will you tell them?

Teacher:

“Further research is required.”

You:

You’re perfect for this mug.

The Snowman Collector

Friend:

Another snowman item?

Collector:

Yes.

Friend:

You have snowman ornaments.

Collector:

Yes.

Friend:

Snowman figurines.

Collector:

Yes.

Friend:

Snowman towels.

Collector:

Yes.

Friend:

Snowman pillows.

Collector:

Yes.

Friend:

Snowman mugs.

Collector:

Now I have another one.

Friend:

How many mugs?

Collector:

That’s an unnecessarily personal question.

Collection Status

SNOWMAN ORNAMENTS: MANY.

SNOWMAN FIGURINES: MANY.

SNOWMAN DECORATIONS: MANY.

SNOWMAN MUGS: ALSO MANY.

AVAILABLE CABINET SPACE: DECLINING.

COLLECTOR CONCERN: ZERO.

Friend:

Of course.

The Color Accent

Friend:

I like the inside.

You:

Thanks.

Friend:

And the handle matches.

You:

Festive science requires festive equipment.

Friend:

That’s not a rule.

You:

It is now.

Color Accent Status

INTERIOR: COLORFUL.

HANDLE: MATCHING.

HOLIDAY CHEER: INCREASED.

BEVERAGE: HOT.

SCIENCE: STILL QUESTIONABLE.

You:

Perfect combination.

The Mug Cabinet

Partner:

We need to talk.

You:

About?

Partner:

Mugs.

You:

What about them?

Partner:

There are too many.

You:

Incorrect.

Partner:

The cabinet won’t close.

You:

Storage problem.

Partner:

Because of the mugs.

You:

Storage.

Problem.

Partner:

You’re impossible.

You:

Want cocoa?

Partner:

…

Yes.

The Snowman Anatomy Color Accent Mug

A wonderfully ridiculous holiday gift for:

Snowman lovers.

Snowman enthusiasts.

Snowman collectors.

Christmas lovers.

Winter lovers.

Snow lovers.

Coffee lovers.

Tea drinkers.

Hot cocoa enthusiasts.

People who believe marshmallows are a food group.

People who fill the entire top of their cocoa with marshmallows.

People who understand whipped cream is not optional in December.

People who need morning coffee.

People who need afternoon coffee.

People who need snow-day coffee.

People who need Christmas-morning coffee.

People who need coffee before going outside in freezing weather.

People who need coffee after coming back inside from freezing weather.

People who choose the 11 oz.

People who choose the 15 oz.

People who know exactly why they choose the 15 oz.

Science nerds.

STEM nerds.

Anatomy nerds.

Diagram nerds.

Biology nerds.

Chemistry nerds.

Physics nerds.

Engineering nerds.

Science teachers.

STEM teachers.

Biology teachers.

Chemistry teachers.

Physics teachers.

Anatomy teachers.

Engineering teachers.

Elementary teachers.

Middle school teachers.

High school teachers.

College professors with a sense of humor.

Science students.

STEM students.

Biology students.

Chemistry students.

Physics students.

Engineering students.

Scientists.

Researchers.

Biologists.

Chemists.

Physicists.

Engineers.

Lab technicians.

Science club members.

Science fair enthusiasts.

People who love labeled diagrams.

People who love fake scientific diagrams.

People who love unnecessarily detailed explanations.

People who appreciate educational-ish Christmas humor.

People fascinated by carrot-based nasal anatomy.

People curious about coal-eye functionality.

People interested in stick-arm biomechanics.

People concerned about rabbit-mediated nasal component removal.

People who understand redundant systems.

People who appreciate an Emergency Backup Snowball.

People who have absolutely no idea what an Emergency Backup Snowball is.

People determined to figure it out.

People who may spend the rest of their lives unsuccessfully attempting to figure it out.

People who build snowmen.

People who build enormous snowmen.

People who build tiny snowmen.

People who build crooked snowmen.

People whose snowman immediately leans.

People who insist the lean gives it character.

People who build snowmen with children.

People who discover children have ambitious snowball-size expectations.

People who roll a snowball until it becomes impossible to move.

People who then realize somebody eventually has to lift it.

People who should have planned ahead.

People who didn’t.

People who search for perfect stick arms.

People who spend far too long comparing sticks.

People who select a carrot specifically for snowman nasal suitability.

People whose carrot disappears overnight.

People who suspect rabbits.

People who conduct snowman repairs.

People who have reattached stick arms.

People who have repositioned coal eyes.

People who have watched a snowman slowly melt.

People who considered putting it in the freezer.

People who understand why that isn’t practical.

People who love snow days.

People who wake up early on snow days.

People whose children wake them up early on snow days.

People who require caffeine before participating in snow days.

People who build snow forts.

People who make snow angels.

People who throw snowballs.

People who maintain Emergency Backup Snowballs.

People who come inside with wet gloves.

People who somehow also have wet socks.

People who immediately make cocoa.

People who watch Christmas movies.

People who have Christmas movie marathons.

People who attend holiday parties.

People who attend office Christmas parties.

People who participate in Secret Santa exchanges.

People who participate in white elephant exchanges.

People who take white elephant exchanges far too seriously.

People who steal the good gift.

People who protect the good gift.

People who know the best white elephant gift is the one everybody tries to steal.

People looking for a funny Christmas mug.

People looking for a funny snowman mug.

People looking for a snowman anatomy mug.

People looking for a science Christmas mug.

People looking for a STEM Christmas mug.

People looking for a science teacher Christmas gift.

People looking for a teacher Christmas mug.

People looking for a scientist gift.

People looking for an engineer gift.

People looking for a biology teacher gift.

People looking for a chemistry teacher gift.

People looking for a physics teacher gift.

People looking for a coworker Christmas gift.

People looking for a Secret Santa mug.

People looking for a white elephant gift.

People looking for a Christmas gag gift.

People looking for a funny holiday coffee mug.

People looking for a quirky Christmas mug.

People looking for festive drinkware.

People looking for a holiday color accent mug.

People looking for a winter coffee cup.

People looking for a hot cocoa mug.

People looking for something more interesting than another generic holiday mug.

And anyone whose idea of a scientifically productive winter morning consists of:

COFFEE.

SNOW.

CARROT NOSES.

COAL EYES.

STICK ARMS.

and one mysteriously important…

EMERGENCY BACKUP SNOWBALL.

Snowman Anatomy Research Status Report

MUG: READY.

CERAMIC: READY.

COLORFUL INTERIOR: FESTIVE.

MATCHING HANDLE: FESTIVE.

11 OZ OPTION: AVAILABLE.

15 OZ OPTION: ALSO AVAILABLE.

COFFEE: POURED.

COCOA: ALSO ACCEPTABLE.

TEA: ALSO ACCEPTABLE.

MARSHMALLOWS: EXCESSIVE.

WHIPPED CREAM: HIGHLY RECOMMENDED BY THE RESEARCH TEAM.

OUTSIDE TEMPERATURE: 24°F.

SNOWFALL: CONFIRMED.

SCHOOL: CANCELED.

CHILD ENERGY: EXTREME.

ADULT ENERGY: MINIMAL.

CAFFEINE: DEPLOYED.

SNOWMAN CONSTRUCTION: AUTHORIZED.

BASE: ROLLED.

BASE: TOO LARGE.

BASE: NO LONGER MOVABLE.

PROJECT MANAGEMENT: QUESTIONABLE.

SECOND ATTEMPT: UNDERWAY.

TORSO: COMPLETE.

HEAD: COMPLETE.

CARROT NOSE: INSTALLED.

COAL EYES: INSTALLED.

STICK ARMS: INSTALLED.

BUTTONS: INSTALLED.

ACTUAL SHIRT FOR BUTTONS: STILL ABSENT.

SCARF: INSTALLED.

PHYSICIST: OBJECTING.

PHYSICIST: IGNORED.

HAT: INSTALLED.

SNOWMAN: COMPLETE.

EMERGENCY BACKUP SNOWBALL: POSITIONED NEARBY.

PURPOSE: STILL UNKNOWN.

RABBIT: DETECTED.

RABBIT DISTANCE FROM CARROT: DECREASING.

SECURITY LEVEL: ELEVATED.

COFFEE LEVEL: DECREASING.

REFILL: REQUIRED.

11 OZ RESEARCHER: CONSIDERING SECOND CUP.

15 OZ RESEARCHER: FEELING VINDICATED.

SNOWBALL FIGHT: INITIATED.

EMERGENCY BACKUP SNOWBALL: SUDDENLY MAKING MORE SENSE.

GLOVES: WET.

SOCKS: ALSO WET.

EVERYONE: BACK INSIDE.

HOT COCOA: POURED.

MARSHMALLOWS: DEPLOYED.

CHRISTMAS MOVIE: PLAYING.

SNOWMAN OUTSIDE: STANDING.

SNOWMAN LEAN: 4°.

ENGINEER: MONITORING.

WEATHER TOMORROW: 43°F.

SNOWMAN: CONCERNED.

SCIENTIFIC ACCURACY OF DIAGRAM: LOW.

COMEDIC ACCURACY: EXCELLENT.

HOLIDAY CHEER: HIGH.

CAFFEINATION: RESTORED.

RESEARCH CONCLUSION: MORE COFFEE REQUIRED.

CURRENT STATUS: SIPPING WITH A SIDE OF SNOWMAN SCIENCE.

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